I didn’t think I wanted to be a weekly columnist until I read a column by comedian Mark Schiff. I’ve never told him this, but I’ll tell him now. In August 2006, I had just moved with my kids to the Pico-Robertson neighborhood when, on a whim, I decided to write a column about our new life in this very …
Great Catch, Champ
For the past few months, I’ve had the pleasure of watching my neighbor Aaron teach his kids how to catch a ball. When a father is playing catch with his son or daughter, there are few things in life that bring more happiness. It’s total enjoyment to the max. It’s amazing to see the smile on a child’s face when …
What’s All the Complaining About?
A waiter comes over to a table where old Jewish women are seated and says, “Excuse me, ladies. Is anything all right?” Jews have a history of complaining. They complained to Moses about not having bread, meat or water. But complaining isn’t always a bad thing. If we complain to our politicians, that’s sometimes a good thing. Complaining to your …
Here Comes the Judge
Everyone hates to be judged, yet most of us do it. Hillel wrote in “Ethics of Our Fathers”: “Do not judge your fellow, until you have reached his or her place.” My cousin Sarah recently died five days short of her 34th birthday. She left behind a 12-year-old son, the father of the boy, and her divorced mother and father. …
The Nearness of You
A few weeks ago I was at the funeral of a good friend. His wife and three children got up and spoke about their husband and father. It was a truly beautiful and moving event. They spoke of how much he meant to them and how he was a friend to all who met him. They spoke of his unwavering support …
Oy Vey Iz Mir I’m Getting Old
I have a friend who told me he takes three pills a day to help him increase his saliva. His doctor said that as you get older, sometimes your saliva dries up. Nice; something new to worry about as I age — a saliva shortage. My next birthday is big one. I pray I still have enough saliva to masticate …
Proof That There’s a God? I’m Still Married
“Before a man gets married, he is incomplete. After he’s married, he’s completely finished.” — Borscht Belt comedian The fact that I got married and have stayed married is proof there is a God. When I asked my rabbi what God was doing these days, he said, “arranging marriages.” He also said that arranging marriages is harder than splitting the …
Consult a Doctor Before Buying Another Gadget
Don’t get me wrong. I really like my iPhone, iPad, Apple Watch, Dell laptop, smart TV and Alexa. I’m connected, baby! I recently took an EKG from my Apple Watch, downloaded it to my iPhone, and then emailed it to my cardiologist. After viewing it and consulting with him, he took a photo of my bill, downloaded it and emailed …
Jews, Non-Jews and Weight Loss
A little more than four years ago, I was walking on Cashio Street and I dropped something on the ground. When I bent down to get it, let’s just say it wasn’t easy to stand back up. I was almost 200 pounds with a big puffy face. I was really starting to feel old. A day or two later, as …
Two Jews Walk Into Israel
On Dec. 19 and 20, Jerry Seinfeld and I will be performing stand-up comedy at the Menora Mivtachim Arena in Tel Aviv. I have not been this excited about doing a gig in years. Jerry and I had talked about going to Israel to perform and, God willing, it’s now happening. Jerry and I have been touring together for more than a …
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